Who Am I and Why Am I Here?!
A little about myself! I’m a “truckers wife” to my incredibly supportive and hardworking husband, Norman, and I’m a homeschooling mama to five wild and free kids! I’m a foster-to-adopt mama, a babywearing mama, an extended breastfeeding mama, a cloth diapering mama. A holistic, low-tox lifestyle is my focus as I raise my children outside of the system. Little by little I am adding more homesteading and homemaking skills to my tool belt, skills that my ancestors thrived on but were lost in today’s mainstream culture of streamlined convenience. Returning back to the roots of our ancestors, I like to say!
When I’m not studying about birth, supporting clients with their health goals and birthing goals or attending births; I am enjoying days with my children that look a bit routine and a bit unstructured.
We enjoy reading together, baking together, going out for nature hikes, attending field trips with our local homeschool group, camping all throughout the summer in our RV. We enjoy slow, quiet mornings and slow, quiet evenings; together. We enjoy leaving margin in our days that allow for quiet moments basking in the bright sunlight, running around our woods and just allowing anything to come up for us!
Birth work captivated me after the birth of my second baby, my first daughter! I have four very different birth stories and for the sake of time, I won’t go over all of the details here. I will link them down below so if you’re a birth story junkie like I am, you can go read them in all their glory!
I had a doula for my second birth which was my first VBAC birth. My first two births were in the hospital with an OBGYN. My third birth started off as another hospital birth with an OBGYN until around 30 weeks when my OBGYN said some concerning things to me that became really big red flags. I went home and told my husband he needed to get on board with a homebirth and FAST. I could not subject myself to anymore trauma, coercion or abuse anymore.
So, we found a homebirth midwife and switched gears! We had the most peaceful, calming, undisturbed birth that exceeded my dreams and my prayers!
A lot of life happened after that third birth. My husband passed away unexpectedly and very suddenly just five months later. Our plans of moving into our new home, of me beginning doula training and becoming a birth worker myself; it was all put on hold.
As life settled down a bit more and we were coming out of the fog of survival mode, I decided to full-steam-ahead begin training as a doula. I completed my certification with ICEA in the summer of 2016, began my training as a Placenta Specialist in the fall of 2016 and began promoting my business, Follow Your Arrow Doula Services. I also met my now husband that summer!
In the fall of 2017 I had attended just over half a dozen births and was beginning to feel “established” as a local birth worker… and then, life twisted again! My nephew was in the hospital with suspected child abuse injuries and I found myself on the road to becoming a kinship foster parent.
In 2018, I felt God calling me to lay down my birth work to focus on my family. We had four young children all needing me in different ways, lots of social worker visits, court dates and medical appointments for our foster baby. So, I made an announcement that I would be “closing my doors” for the foreseeable future in order to fully focus on my family.
On one hand, I felt my calling for birth work was for that ONE birth of my nephew. On the other hand, I felt I would be back… one day. The desire and the passion continued to burn deep within me for years. I dreamt of attending births and educating women who were seeking answers for themselves instead of blindly following the recommendations of the medical model of care.
The dream stayed tucked within me. Perhaps once our kids were grown I could return back to birth work. I pursued other avenues to help others, to help women and to help educate along the way with health coaching and diving deeper into how nutrition fuels everything we do.
In 2021, our fifth baby graced my womb! Knowing a homebirth was the only option I would entertain, we began crafting our birth team. Along the way I was drawn to a deeper dive into the spiritual work and full autonomy, full responsibility. While we had a midwife for my husband’s comfort, I pursued an unassisted birth in every sense of the term. Educating myself, praying, meditating on God’s Word. Taking full ownership and radical responsibility of our experience.
Little did I know, this little baby would present me with many opportunities to lean into God, worship, prayer, scripture and God’s Promises throughout his pregnancy leading up to his birth.
After the birth of our fifth baby, I truly thought all my desire and passion for birth work would fizzle out and fade away… But it did quite the opposite!
I joined a birth worker circle, I prayed about my role in the birth community, I asked God to reveal to me a clear path if picking up birth work, again, was truly the path He needed me on.
In the midst of not being sure how birth work fit into my life moving forward, I just kept myself “in the space” of birth. I read as much as I could, I prayed, I began working on a website just for fun… a lot of things I did didn’t make much sense but I felt I was on the right path and doing what God wanted me to be doing.
One afternoon I was asked to pray about being a backup doula. Around the same time, a friend of mine and her daughter reached out to me as a friend, as a doula and as a mentor. I was asked to attend her birth and it all just felt… right. The next month, I was asked to attend a birth with a long-time friend and midwife as her midwife assistant!
After all had settled from those three births, I felt excitement but some confusion too. If I’m not meant to pickup birth work again, what was the purpose behind all these births?
Another random afternoon in the summer of 2022, I was asked to give a friend a call. She simply said, “God told me to call you, you’re supposed to be my doula.”
It was in that moment that I knew God was calling me back into birth work and I knew right then, that I would hold space to be called and to go where called.
So, here I am! That’s why I’m here! I’m here because I was called. I’m here because I am the birth worker that many women need and as a woman who bares servant hands, I want to be made available to the calling.
On a practical level, I’m here because I’ve been called. If I had to sum it up in one word, called. This is my calling, this is what I’m supposed to do. This is what I’m supposed to do to serve women. I’m called to be in that space, to hold that space, to be that trusting, guiding light. I’m here because I want to hold that space, to go where I’m called and to have the space to answer that calling.
I’m called to be a lighthouse, to help others find a better way. I really wish that, in my first birth, I had someone that would gently say, “Hey, there’s a better way. That deep questioning within you that you don’t understand because the medical mainstream is telling you “this is just the way it is, this is just the way we do things.” Deep within me I knew there was something that didn’t feel right. But we live in a society that wants to dismiss instinct and intuition. I want to be available to be that woman for someone to say, “No, there’s a reason why you’re questioning this. There’s a reason why so deep within you this doesn’t feel right.” We need to get back to that, we need to get back to those instincts and intuition. Go back to the way of our ancestors and back to the days where women simply attended and served women. I mean, isn’t that a midwife?!
I want to be available to provide the education, the wisdom, the faith, the trust. To be a wise big sister, to walk alongside you. To be the heart, the hands, the eyes and the feet of Jesus. To be the trusting spirit in the corner.
I have these really deep visions, that really excite me(!) of being a Granny Midwife! That is who I’m supposed to be! Raising all these babies and then turning around to attend the births of my grandchildren. Be that wise old grandma attending this women!
I want to be available for women who are ready to take back their power, to realize that they are in charge of their bodies, their babies, their experiences, their journeys. YOU hold that power, sister! You do! Not me. Not your doctor. Not your midwife. YOU. You and you alone.
My vision is making radical waves within our community!
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